Romantic Relationships

What is it?

Check out these tips for maintaining happy, healthy relationships from http://www.weber.edu/CounselingCenter/relationships.html:

  • Apologize: Show your partner that you are willing to be accountable for your words and actions. Apologize when you have been hurtful.
  • Agree to disagree: When reaching an impasse, it is better to let the issue go than continue trying to persuade your partner, which may result in feelings of resentment. Adopting this philosophy supports the goal of preserving the relationship.
  • Embrace change: Change is inevitable. It is helpful to recognize change for what it is and seek opportunities for enhancing the relationship, rather than trying to prevent change from happening.
  • Check in: Take time periodically to clarify your understandings of goals and expectations in the relationship.
  • Choose your time wisely: Agree on times to discuss and resolve conflicts. Couples should avoid engaging in conflict resolution until each partner is calm and clear about what he/she really wants.
  • Fight fairly: Conflicts are normal, and they can be handled in healthy ways. Listen to one another. Express and respond to your partner’s thoughts and feelings. Avoid blaming, name-calling, and defensiveness. And don’t forget to work on a solution together.
  • Clarify your message: Say what you mean. Saying you’d like your partner to hold your hand more often is more specific, and more effective, than saying you would like more affection.
  • Show restraint: Choose your words carefully. Some thoughts are best kept to oneself and processed internally before sharing. Some thoughts don’t need to be shared at all.
  • Time together: Partners may vary on the amount of time they want/need to spend together in order to feel satisfied and secure. Discussing your feelings about this issue can prevent inaccurate assumptions and hurt feelings.
  • Extended families: Just as partners vary on their preferences for “couple time,” their expectations may differ regarding time spent with one another’s extended family as well. Discuss your expectations without judgment or criticism.
  • Friends: Support your partner in developing and maintaining healthy friendships. Friends meet important needs that partners may not, so having good friends actually supports the relationship. Discuss which friends you may wish to enjoy time with individually or together.

Assessment:

What is your style of romantic attachment?: http://psychcentral.com/quizzes/romancequiz.htm

RESOURCES

Apps:

  • Avocado (iOS, Android): is a private and secure way for couples to stay connected.
  • Icebreak for Couples (iOS, Android): Stay connected with the one you love. Answer and
  • share fun questions and moments with each other.
  • Tokii (iOS, Android): gives couples a private and secure venue to work on their relationship online or via mobile app.

On-Campus:

  • CAREfrontation drop-in group through CTS; Thursdays from 12:00-1:00 PM  in Chestnut Hall 311
  • Couples counseling available (if all members of the relationship are UNT students) through CTS; call 940-565-2741 to schedule an appointment

Off-Campus: